From FOMO to JOMO: The Joy of Missing Out

Por: @mashup.br

In a world where we are constantly bombarded by alerts, notifications, and the pressure to be "always connected," the experience of feeling like we're missing out has become almost inevitable. The phenomenon of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) — the fear of being left out of conversations, events, or fun — has infiltrated our routines, often invisibly, but undeniably present.

However, a new concept is starting to gain momentum, changing the narrative from deprivation to freedom: JOMO (Joy of Missing Out). Or simply, the joy of being absent. The idea behind this shift is not simply rejecting the digital world or avoiding social interactions, but rather a conscious choice to be present in what truly matters. More than a temporary detox, it is a profound transformation in the way we manage time, technology, and, above all, ourselves.

Source: Unsplash I Eugene Chystiakov

This concept becomes even more relevance in the digital age. Carl Honoré , a Canadian journalist and a prominent figure in the Slow Movement, author of In Praise of Slow: How a Worldwide Movement Is Challenging the Cult of Speed, invites us to reflect on how hyperconnection has redefined our identity and sense of belonging. But he goes further: he also explores other facets of this movement, whether in sex, urbanism trends, or in choosing ingredients and cooking. For him, constant speed distances us from our true essence. "We live in a world obsessed with speed, where haste has become a symbol of efficiency. But are we really living, or are we just moving too fast to notice what matters?" Honoré questions.

The fear of missing out forces us to be constantly in motion, consuming, participating, and validating our existence through digital presence and the relentless pursuit of novelty. In this context, disconnecting becomes, for many, almost unthinkable. However, Honoré shows us a liberating possibility: choosing to be absent intentionally, consciously, and, most importantly, joyfully.

"We need leisure to recharge our batteries, but we also need silence to get to know ourselves, to listen to what is going on inside our body and mind, to establish connections with others. We need leisure to be human."

For decades, the culture of "not missing out" has been fueled by the urgency of consumer society, where the constant search for novelty translates into status and validation. However, at the height of social media, this obsession with being everywhere at once has intensified, creating a sense of scarcity — as if, by not being present, our lives lose value.

But by accepting this "loss" as a choice, we can free ourselves from the shackles of a superficial existence filled with distractions. Honoré argues that "the secret is not in rejecting technology, but in using it intentionally. Instead of being prisoners of constant connectivity, we can use it to our advantage."

Source: Pexels I Pollna

Technology as an Ally, Not an Enemy

Far from trying to convince anyone to distance themselves from social media with all their might, knowing it would be impossible, it is possible to use digital tools intentionally, without letting them consume us. Social media, for example, can become a space for genuine and empathetic exchange, if healthy boundaries can be established. "The key to digital happiness is not abstinence, but moderation," he states.

One of the greatest challenges for those trying to embrace JOMO is the fear that disconnecting means being left out of "essential conversations" or missing valuable opportunities. Honoré challenges this notion, proposing that the true opportunity lies in cultivating a more focused and meaningful presence, rather than being everywhere at once, without truly being in any of those places.

Source: Pexels cottonbro studio

JOMO and the Rescue of Personal Identity

The anxiety generated by the fear of missing out is one of the defining traits of the current generation, undermining our ability to focus on what truly makes us happy. We live in a constant cycle of comparison, where the "success" of others feeds insecurity about our own choices. However, by adopting a more introspective perspective, we can redefine this notion, no longer in relation to others, but from an internal viewpoint.

Honoré emphasizes that true fulfillment is not about accumulating experiences or proving our worth to others, but about finding a rhythm that respects our individuality. This movement also allows us to appreciate simple and profound moments, often overshadowed by the need for digital validation. In a world dominated by virtual personalities and mass content production, reclaiming authenticity becomes an act of resistance.

Source: Unsplash I Richard Sagredo

True freedom is not about living according to others' expectations, but about being able to cultivate a more meaningful presence — even if that means stepping away from certain spaces, including digital ones. The transition to this new mindset is not easy, as it requires the courage to redefine what it means to "belong." However, by making this choice, we can rediscover a lost balance and, paradoxically, connect more deeply and authentically with the world around us.

In the end, slowing down is an invitation to look inward, to recognize that we don’t need to be everywhere all the time, and that by stopping the pursuit of everything, we can finally find what truly matters.

Por Rafaela Fornitani 8 de janeiro de 2025

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